Episode 22 Final
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[00:00:00] Welcome to the Extraordinary Life Podcast from the creator of the Extraordinary Life Tribe, Crystal Obregon, the self-development podcast propelling you forward toward your goals. Using science backed high performance habits. Reach the next level in your physical and mental health. See new Heights in your relationships.
[00:00:18] Gain clarity on your purpose and live your extraordinary life. Welcome your host writers, speaker and coach crystal over gone. Hi there. This is Crystal with Crystal Obregon coaching and episode number 22 of the Extraordinary Life Podcast. This week in anticipation for an online event, I am participating in as a speaker called the Gatherer Community Winter Celebration.
[00:00:49] I'm sharing the talk I gave last spring in the sister event. The link to attend on December 10th will be included in the show notes. [00:01:00] It's interactive, fun, and filled with great speakers and community. Last spring I spoke about the beliefs. You must have to move forward and create success in your life.
[00:01:13] It's a great topic for this time of year. As we gather with friends and family and become aware of where our beliefs came from and more intentional about what our beliefs will be in the future with that said a few things I say. May not be applicable as this was a live interactive environment, but listen in and as always take what works for you.
[00:01:42] Here we go.
[00:01:43] We're going to kick it off and I'm going to kick it off with funny enough, the same fabulous speaker who kicked off our gather creative sessions last December. And I didn't even know that until she told me because. It's the perfect energy [00:02:00] and the perfect way to start your day to think about what's possible, how we can dream about our future, how we can really go after the things that we want in life by building your habits and your high-performance habits.
[00:02:12] I want to introduce to you Crystal Obregon of Crystal Obregon Coaching. Crystal is an amazing high-performance coach. She and I have known each other for a couple of years. We're in our Polkadots chapter together. And I just really, she is this idea of being able to really dream about your future. I will say she is the person who finally helped me realize that I could imagine five years from now, 10 years from now, what is possible in the future.
[00:02:41] Right. I was always very short short-sighted right. Kind of what happens when you're moving day by day. But crystal really helped me open up that perspective. And I can't wait to hear what she's going to have to share with us today. So crystal, please take it away. Well, now I'm going to cry, Tracy.[00:03:00]
[00:03:03] Thank you for all your kind words. So today I'm going to talk about the belief. That you need to be successful. And when I'm talking about being successful, I'm not just talking about making more money. What I'm really talking about is a holistic life where you feel successful. So you have great relationships.
[00:03:26] You have great health. Yes. Your career and your purpose are on point. And you're doing things you love. You also have hobbies. You're living where you want to live. There are so many things that go into creating what I call an extraordinary life. I'm going to talk about those beliefs. I'm going to go pretty quickly, because I also want to spend some time at the end talking about how to create those beliefs, [00:04:00] because we don't just live in.
[00:04:02] Every single day. So must have beliefs to create sustainable success. The reason why I am sharing this is because so much of our beliefs we've built up over time. And many times we've built them up as children and with our families of origin and they don't necessarily serve us because they also came from their parents.
[00:04:26] And so we really do need to. Take that time to examine what our beliefs are and whether they're actually true. So that really comes into thinking and being self-aware. So really you just can't leave everything to circumstance. And the sooner you realize that you do have control over your thoughts and your beliefs, the sooner you can move ahead and move past them, because you'd be surprised how many.
[00:04:57] They hold you back. [00:05:00] So there are really three types of beliefs and the first type of belief is belief in yourself. If you really want to create an extraordinary life, You really need to know and believe that success is possible. And not only that it's possible without compromising the other areas of your life.
[00:05:22] And that's why I really talk a lot about sustainable success because the studies actually show that the most successful people contrary to popular belief, they do sleep enough and they do eat well and they do have great relationships. And I know. Especially. I mean, it just say, I don't know if there are any men on here, but just our patriarchal society has really created this belief, but it's actually not true.
[00:05:51] The first belief in that category is that you are, or you're trying to be congruent with the best of [00:06:00] who, you know, you can be. And the big part of that is really. Knowing who you want to be. And that's where that work, that Tracy mentioned of looking at how you want your life to be five or 10 years from now.
[00:06:15] And that's not just your external circumstances. That's also who you are being. It's knowing that you are trying and to be congruent with that person, that exercises. And we're going to hear from a lot of people today that really healthy. With these things you believe in yourself when you know that you are trying to be a better parent or you're trying to be a better wife, or you're trying to be better in your business, or you're trying to exercise more, all those things.
[00:06:46] The second belief is that you are capable of achieving the future that you want. So that could mean that you have the skills right now to create that future, or it could mean that you know, that [00:07:00] you're capable of learning what you need to be successful and to achieve the future you want really building that capability.
[00:07:10] And then the third one is that you're worthy or deserving of having extraordinary success. And that can be a big one as women because I've seen it just in my prior generations. Gratitude is a big part of my life and I have that practice every single morning. And I think it's super important. But while you are grateful for what you have, you also have to believe that you're worthy of having.
[00:07:39] I told you I was going to go fast cause I really want to get to that next part. So in the chat right now, can everybody think of one word or a couple words or a phrase that describes your best self when everything is going really well, when you really feel like you're congruent with your best self identity, no matter what that is.[00:08:00]
[00:08:00] Go ahead and light the chat apps for a second. Confident, generous, present. Happy. Listening, thoughtful, energetic. I love these and that joyful balance. Completely trusting myself, calm in alignment, informative, valuable, warm. I love that. Okay. So the second type of belief that you need to have is the belief in others.
[00:08:27] The most successful people have strong beliefs in the capabilities of others. The social influences. That successful people bring into their lives are what set them apart and successful people also interact with people beyond their own needs. They engage with others for support and mentorship. And so actually I know that since you're here, you're doing that just by being here, you are opening yourself up to support and mentorship, [00:09:00] and those of you that are sharing today.
[00:09:03] Are also helping others and have a belief in others to achieve more. So the first of those beliefs is that other people are trustworthy. If you don't believe other people are trustworthy, then obviously that can lead to loneliness in your personal life. It can also lead to not asking for help. It can lead to not being able to build a team to help you.
[00:09:32] Achieve your goals and to help others. I know that so many of you here also have a life where you are helping others. It's really necessary to have that. The second one is that other people are good, that other people are value-driven. You may not agree with their strategies, but if you have a belief that other people are good and that even if, [00:10:00] maybe you don't quite like how they do something, That they do have a value that you might share, say that they want to do good for their family or whatever that is.
[00:10:11] If you have that belief, then you have more of a chance of influencing them to choose better strategies or make better choices in how they express that value. The third, and this one is really important is that other people are struggling. If you think of that, then you can actually knock out a lot of conflict in your life.
[00:10:37] It can start at home if you don't like how your husband or your kid acted one day that you remember that. Okay. Even though they're close to me, they might be struggling with something. Or if somebody is rude to you at the grocery store or cuts in front of the. When you're driving, if you can have that belief that you actually don't know what's going [00:11:00] on in their lives, then it really just opens up a whole lot of possibility.
[00:11:08] All right. So this is a bigger question and I'll definitely have some prompts in the breakout Slater, but give an example in the chat of how you have trusted others with your vision and goals or how you could in the future. So that's a big one, but let's see if off the cuff, anyone can share how they've trusted others with their vision and their goals.
[00:11:35] Talk about it with them being open to learn from others. I love that. That'd be learning to ask for help has been huge, especially in team building. I know brainstorming having a coach. Yes. Asking for feedback. That's yes. Having coaches awesome. Being open to suggestions, masterminding being [00:12:00] with other high achieving women.
[00:12:01] S Catarina. All right. Good job. The third category and final category of beliefs is belief in the world in the future. Which can be hard. It can be hard these days. So extraordinary people. They believe that the world is a beautiful place that deserves every individual's absolute best. And that's where if you can shift your focus, outward to the opportunities available to serve and continuously make a better world for yourself and those around you.
[00:12:41] It skyrockets everything, your results, no matter what it is, whether it's in your business, whether it's with your kids, all of those areas are huge. The first belief is that the world in the future is safe. And that's huge right now. Obviously it has been, [00:13:00] especially we've been in a pandemic for the past.
[00:13:03] But we're all here. And I know some people have struggled a lot more than others, and a lot of people have lost family members in general. We still need to believe that the world and the future is safe. And then the second belief is that the world and future is abundant. There is enough for everyone.
[00:13:25] There's enough money. There's enough food. There are enough resources. We also have a part of believing that there is enough for us as well, but it goes in a few ways. And then the third belief is that the world in the future is improving. And honestly it is 20, 30 years ago. Would we have thought, or when we were kids, would we have thought we were doing this?
[00:13:49] Would we have thought that our kid could just call us from a cell phone if they were hurt or needed us or something? Everything hems with its drawbacks. In general, the [00:14:00] evidence is that the world actually is improving as an extraordinary human and an individual contributor. How are you, or how will you improve the world?
[00:14:13] So go ahead and light up the chat with that, because I know that you will, I have seen the evidence of how much these prompts are really on the top of your mind. So helping others and being kind empowering others, continuing to value yourself, spread kindness, bring people together. Yes, Tracy, this is so fun.
[00:14:34] I was so excited to do this again and spreading joy being the best you it's just, it raises the vibration of everyone. Gifts, stories, pouring love and optimism into your kids' hearts. Wow. I love this. So many things. So I can tell that by some of your answers that [00:15:00] whether you know it or not, you do, you know, many of the ways to increase belief.
[00:15:06] And I just love that, but I will go through them. The first one is momentum and okay, you're saying, well, if you don't have momentum, you don't have momentum, but actually you can create momentum. In some part of your life this past year was crazy. I saw Tracy create a whole heck of a lot of momentum. It's awesome.
[00:15:30] And I've seen other people pivot quickly. Not everybody did that's okay. Definitely. I came out running and I had this little dip, but you know what I mean? I created a different kind of momentum for myself. I exercise more until the fires hit and then, okay. I can't even go outside then. Okay. I'm looking around at these walls.
[00:15:50] I can't have anybody inside to paint them. I'm going to paint the inside of my house, which I did except for my master bedroom. And you know what, I'm not doing [00:16:00] it. I was super happy to do all that. And I'm done painting. I'm gonna have somebody else come in. But I felt that momentum and in both those things, it was fun.
[00:16:09] It was like a physical, like I could see a difference. And then when I was ready to totally focus on my business, again, I just jumped right in and this event was super helpful in that. Then next one is integration. So what integration is, is actually integrating your wins, no matter how small you need to give yourself credit and really celebrate, celebrate what is going well.
[00:16:36] And sometimes it's really small and sometimes it's big, but if you don't stop and celebrate what you accomplished. You'll be on to the next thing onto the next thing onto the next thing, but you won't build that belief in yourself and it leads to burnout for a lot of people and, or quitting because they just don't see the progress if they haven't celebrated and it creates momentum.
[00:16:59] So that's [00:17:00] also another way to create momentum. And then I saw somebody mentioned feedback, which is the next one. Sometimes that feedback is from your family and friends. If it's around your personal. But sometimes those are not the people that you need feedback from. If you are running a business and you have these great ideas or you're working your business, if your family or your friends, aren't your ideal clients.
[00:17:29] Your feedback from them is not going to be helpful. So surrounding yourself with people like this community, like a mastermind, they're all kinds of people in here that could help you surround yourself with the community that you need, where you can get valuable feedback. All right, I'm done. I do have my designer decade workshop coming up next week and it's on the gather calendar.
[00:17:55] Also, I have a freebie in the dashboard [00:18:00] and I'm so excited. I love you guys. I'm going to go back and read all the comments and thank you, Tracy.
[00:18:06] You definitely want to go back and read the comments because I know how we know when you're speaking. Obviously you can't really keep track and some people have some really amazing things to say there.
[00:18:16] It's super exciting to see all of. You guys, let's give crystal some love. You can come off mute and give her some cheers. You can give her a hearts on the screen and get, do whatever. Just such a pleasure to have you start. And I love that you were able to. You're resilient and let the whole screen share.
[00:18:37] Right. We all got, I prefer anyway, a challenge, especially when we're kicking things off. Right. Because you know, everyone else is going, oh, I better be ready now. So you had to be the Guinea pig. I appreciate you so much.
[00:18:49] Thank you for listening in, as I said at the beginning. The Gather Community Winter Celebration is happening on December 10th.
[00:18:59] There are [00:19:00] various levels of tickets available. The link for more information into registers in the show notes as is the link for the three different live two hour design, your decade workshops that are happening on December 14th and 15th. I hope to see you at one or both. That's it for now. Have a great rest of your day and see you in here next to.
[00:19:27] Bye for now. Thank you for listening to the Extraordinary Life Podcast with writer and coach Crystal Obregon. We'd love to connect with you outside of the podcast, too. To find more helpful insights, show notes and more about crystal. Go to crystal obregon.com that's O B R E G O N, where you will also find info for the Design.
[00:19:47] Your Decade workshop. This workshop will help you to stop drifting and start creating until next time. Be extraordinary.
