Podcast Episode #26 Final
===
[00:00:00] Welcome to the Extraordinary Life Podcast from the creator of the Extraordinary Life Tribe, Crystal Obregon, the self-development podcast propelling you forward toward your goals. Using science backed high performance habits. Reach the next level in your physical and mental health, see new heights in your relationships, gain clarity on your purpose and live your extraordinary.
[00:00:23] Welcome your host writer, speaker and coach Crystal Obregon. . Hi there. This is Crystal from Crystal Obregon Coaching. With episode number 26 of the Extraordinary Life Podcast.
[00:00:40] Have you ever wondered how some people seem to have everything they dream of? And for others, it either remains just a dream or seems to be forgotten entirely. Fortunately, I'm here to tell [00:01:00] you that it's not a question of genetics or luck. It really comes down to the strategies you use. In this episode, I'm going to share seven strategies to help you turn your dreams into reality.
[00:01:18] Strategy. Number one is understanding what is important to you. We talked about this, or I talked about this a little bit last week, but have you spent intentional time deciding what your core values. And Renee Brown's book dare to lead. She suggests choosing your top two values that are important to you, and it is really hard to choose only two, but if you have too many competing values, you really aren't going to live into them as well.
[00:01:57] So look up core values on the [00:02:00] internet to get a list to choose from. Bernay brown has a list as well. Just look up dare to lead values list and I'll have it in the chat as well. The point is that if a goal or dream is in line with your values, you'll get the energy and motivation that lead you towards the goal or dream.
[00:02:24] You know, you've probably experienced this type of energy and motivation at some point in your life. If you've been excited about getting married, buying a house or going on vacation, or even getting into college way back in the day, you know, that the excitement about the goal is what helps you take the actions to get there.
[00:02:47] But we often don't target the use of this behavior on a regular basis towards getting what you want in life. If your goals don't match your values, [00:03:00] you spend time trying to make them fit instead of achieving them. And we could go back to the college example. I've known plenty of people who were guided into a college experience or a college maybe.
[00:03:15] That they weren't that excited with. And honestly, for most of them, they ended up not doing that well. So try and really think of what those values are and decide if your goals and dreams really fit with. And if they don't consider rearranging, shifting, doing what you can to really seek some clarity on the goals and dreams that really do fit with your values.
[00:03:46] So for example, new year's day is just a couple of days away and you might already be thinking about setting some new year's resolutions. Before you do that. [00:04:00] I want you to really think back to those. You sat in the past and think about how many of them you did achieve. So what was the difference between those that you did achieve and those that you didn't?
[00:04:15] I suspect that for those, you didn't achieve the cost in terms of time, money or loss of something else was too high. If you have a greater understanding of your values, you craft your goals and your dreams in line with them, and then address some of the other key areas that I'm going to talk about.
[00:04:39] You'll be rewarded with the energy and the motivation to make them happen with a lot more ease. Strategy number two is to optimize the use of your time. Productivity is a big one and that's part of it. But once you've decided what's really important to you, then you must [00:05:00] distinguish between which activities you do are the most important and urgent.
[00:05:06] And I see people all the time reacting to what's asked of them, or simply working through a random to-do list. Or just simply waiting to do something until it's really urgent if you've ever worked for a demanding boss or if you're the demanding boss or in a chaotic organization. You'll know what I mean.
[00:05:29] In the course sessions of the extraordinary life tribe program, I teach a project-based productivity philosophy because all tasks on a to-do list are not equal. And the predo principle is helpful to think about, look it up. If you haven't heard of it, it states that 80% of your results come from 20% of your efforts.
[00:05:54] So really consider what is your 20% of efforts [00:06:00] that will get you to the 80% of results. All right. The third strategy is to start where you are now. With the end in mind, it's really important to know both where you are and where you want to go. Just try to get directions from Google maps, by putting in only one of those.
[00:06:23] It really can not give you directions and less in those, both of those. First of all. It's really important with the end in mind to dream big enough, so that it's exciting and that it's stretching you. That's why I like the 10 year dreams. And then the short term goals is because a ten-year dream can be big and audacious and exciting and stretch.
[00:06:52] You. Whereas the shorter term goals, you want them to stretch you, but they're going to be a little bit more [00:07:00] so-called believable for you. And then second, it's important to start where you are. If you start too far ahead of where you are, you might get frustrated and quit. If you start too far behind where you are, you'll get bored and the process will feel meaningless.
[00:07:21] The so-called magical thinking is often the result of setting out without a realistic view of your present situation and magical thinking can turn to disappointment, which. Turns to frustration and ultimately little or no significant progress. If you've never heard of the so-called magical thinking, it's basically this idea that you can achieve what you want outside of the law of cause and effect.
[00:07:57] I'll go into that more and other time [00:08:00] at the end of the day, you have only three resources. Physical and mental energy time and money. And it's really important to make optimal use of those resources. The fourth strategy is to be prepared to meet challenges. No amount of planning will prepare for any eventuality.
[00:08:26] And if you consider these unplanned events to be problems that prevent your progress, well, they will be. People that achieve their dreams. Aren't put off by these events and may even be energized by the richness of opportunities that come from these obstacles, with the right mindset, the journey to achievement can be viewed as one opportunity after another, which reinforces your belief in your success.
[00:08:58] You just have to be open [00:09:00] to the possibility. And really my story about being in midwifery school and having my son. Get sick and then having to deal with his behavior problems that year one, it wasn't great for my goal and dream of becoming a midwife, but there were all these possibilities that came out of it.
[00:09:22] And if I really had wanted to hold onto that dream of being a midwife, I should have had some ideas of what I would do. If one of my kids did get sick, or if something else happened, seeing as my kids were still not super young, but enough on the younger side, the fifth strategy is to use your imagination, but not to use it to imagine and desirable outcome.
[00:09:55] You were born with a very powerful imagination [00:10:00] and on one hand, imagining a future outcome, that's not going to be to your advantage, can lead to worry, stress and fear. It can drain your energy and your motivation. But imagining a positive outcome of the future releases more of the energy and motivation.
[00:10:21] You need to succeed at your goals. And fortunately, the structure you use in your mind is the same for both positive and negative imagination. So with skill and practice, you can switch over from the imagination that generates fear to the one that generates excitement and anticipation. And again, one of my most powerful tools, and I know I keep stressing this, but it's really writing down my 10 dreams for 10 years from now as if they'd already happened.
[00:10:55] I do this practically every morning and it builds my [00:11:00] imagination muscle as I imagined my dream life. And I connect to it every day and it generates excitement for my day to do the things that. We'll put me forward on that path, to that dream life. The sixth strategy is to form your goals well, and what do I mean by that?
[00:11:22] It's all about self-awareness, it's important to consider a number of factors. One is to create a clear picture of how things will be when you've accomplished your goal or your dream. And it's just as important to have a clear understanding of what you'll lose when you have it, because there's always a bit of a trade-off when you don't factor in the so-called loss pain, you're less likely to adapt your thinking around the loss and it can prevent you from achieving what you want.
[00:11:59] As my [00:12:00] mentor explains it. You're often losing something of a lower nature in order to gain something of a higher nature. And a simple example could be losing out on going out with friends for a drink after work on Friday, but gaining fitness by committing and going for a walk or run or getting some kind of exercise instead of.
[00:12:28] If you factored in that future loss of going out with friends after work, perhaps you'll invite a friend or friends to go with you to get exercise or a walk or run. And so then your chances of success will be considerably increased. The seventh and last strategy is to believe that what you want is possible for you.
[00:12:55] If you hold negative beliefs about whether the goal is [00:13:00] achievable, whether you'll achieve it. And even whether it's really right for you, you may sabotage your results. It's important to overcome those beliefs. I talked about this in episode number 22. So definitely go back and give that a listen, if you need to review it or haven't heard it yet.
[00:13:20] But you can change the beliefs that you developed through childhood and into the present moment, but you really do have to be aware of them. First self-awareness is the key to all of these strategies and it simply takes practice and repetition. I have many opportunities coming up soon to help you increase your self awareness.
[00:13:48] And build a community of fellow goal and dream Saturday. So I would invite you to join one of my interactive Design Your Decade Goals and [00:14:00] Dreams workshops next week. If neither of them fit into your schedule, go ahead and grab the do it yourself version and go through the videos and the workbook and the Success Habits Reboot starts on Thursday, January 13th.
[00:14:17] We meet for Thursdays for an hour each, and it's a great introduction to group coaching and the community. And high-performance coaching. And then soon after that, I will be opening my Extraordinary Life Group coaching membership, and I'll have details coming soon for that. So have a terrific new year's and I will see you in 2022.
[00:14:48] Bye for now. Thank you for listening to the extraordinary life podcast with rider and coach crystal over gone. We'd love to connect with you outside of the podcast, too. To find more helpful [00:15:00] insights, show notes and more about Crystal.
[00:15:02] Go to Crystal Obregon dot com that's O B R E G O N, where you will also find info for the Design Your Decade workshop. This workshop will help you to stop drifting and start creating until next. Be extraordinary.
