[00:00:00] Welcome to the Extraordinary Life Podcast from the creator of the Extraordinary Life Tribe, Crystal Obregon, the self-development podcast propelling you forward toward your goals. Using science backed high performance habits. Reach the next level in your physical and mental health. See new Heights in your relationships.
[00:00:18] Gain clarity on your purpose and live your extraordinary life. Welcome your host writers, speaker and coach crystal over gone. Hi there. This is crystal from Crystal Obregon Coaching with episode number 19 of the Extraordinary Life Podcast. In the past few months, I've been talking about habits that help you create an extraordinary life.
[00:00:47] This is where we start in my coaching sessions to lay a personal development and foundation to build a. Once your habit foundation is laid. You're ready to literally take it to [00:01:00] the next level today. And in the coming weeks, I'm going to talk about the components of an extraordinary life and how you can lift yourself out of a life that's already comfortable to pursue your own extraordinary life.
[00:01:16] I've been thinking about this after a conversation I had with a friend about a week ago. Our kids have grown up together. Our oldest are off to college and our youngest are in high school. We were talking about my coaching and she expressed that I should work with more young adults as they're just starting out.
[00:01:36] And they have bigger goals and dreams than women, our age, who are happy enough with the status quo and aren't as willing to step out of their comfort zones to achieve. She mentioned this because in my last two podcasts, I've used young adults as examples of developing influence and demonstrating [00:02:00] courage.
[00:02:00] So go back and listen to those later. If you haven't. I've been pondering the conversation ever since, especially since I consider her one of my growth friends, which means I feel like she's somebody that I grow with. And we also often revisit topics we've discussed after we've given them some more thoughts.
[00:02:23] So I knew I disagreed, but I wanted to gain clarity on why. And I'm not disagreeing about this coaching being helpful for young adults. I'm just disagreeing with the idea that women, our age aren't as likely to pursue more. I do agree with the first part and that's that when my clients come to me, they would generally describe their lives as.
[00:02:55] They have what they need and they're grateful for what they [00:03:00] have. They tend to live in nice homes. They enjoy their family and friends, but they do want more. They want more meaning, more purpose, more change, more growth, more joy, more challenge. And I also agree that many women, our age living a comfortable life are happily maintaining the status quo.
[00:03:25] Maybe I'll come back to that later. I'll start with my observations of the women that are pursuing an extraordinary life and what I consider the definition or the components of an extraordinary life. I say pursuing, because really it's just as much about the journey as the destination we don't ever really get there.
[00:03:50] Hopefully some of the women I'm thinking about are my coaching clients and others are women in groups I belong to. [00:04:00] And just like the women in my coaching groups are choosing to surround themselves with a community of like minded women. I also try to surround myself with a supportive community of like-minded women.
[00:04:16] The other thing about when my clients come to me is that they're often experiencing an underlying sense of discontent as they go through their day to day life. They've been spending their time doing what they're supposed to be doing, being the person they're supposed to be and living the way they're supposed to be living.
[00:04:40] And like I said, they generally have more than they need to simply survive. They know they have good lives and sometimes feel a little guilty for wanting something. Especially if it takes time and attention away from their loved ones or takes them [00:05:00] off the path of being the perfect partner, family member, mom, coworker, or employee, it just doesn't always seem practical to seek more.
[00:05:11] On the other hand, my clients do tend to have at least a rough idea of what they do want to be working towards. And what is most important to them at this age? We do have an idea of what our preferences are, what we like, what we don't like, what our passions. In the first sessions of working together, whether one-on-one or in a group, we do work on clarifying even more, what they really want both now and in the future, because people that are pursuing an extraordinary life are future oriented.
[00:05:49] They have a detailed vision of their future. And are actively working towards making that vision a reality. They understand that an extraordinary life doesn't just [00:06:00] happen. They must consciously create what they want in their lives. And we start this work in the design, your decade workshop, and then continue it into the extraordinary life tribe or in my personal coaching.
[00:06:15] And I, in fact, recommend that my clients go through the design, your decade workshop yearly, at least because clarity isn't one and done life isn't static like that. And as they take action towards their goals and dreams, They usually will change and shift. Remember I've said that clarity happens when you're taking action and also as they become more self-aware they become more certain about what is, and isn't right for them as they're taking those steps forward.
[00:06:49] Also having that clarity. And even when I write down my 10 dreams every day in the morning, I get excited. I'm [00:07:00] optimistic and enthusiastic about my future, and that makes the journey itself more joyful and meaningful. And it also keeps you on track. So once they work through the details of what they really want.
[00:07:16] The next part, especially for my clients, being women mostly is really fitting it in with their people because another characteristic of people pursuing an extraordinary life. Is there interest in connecting with others, their relationships with people, both inside and outside of their homes are important to them.
[00:07:39] So it has to all fit together. They want to pursue what's important to them, but not at the detriment of their family or friends, it achieving their goals and dreams would be empty without bringing others, their loved ones. Along with that. And they also see in the relationships a two way street. [00:08:00] It's really an opportunity for connecting for learning, growing, and sharing, but also getting that outside perspective.
[00:08:09] That's really important because in that supportive group, we can point out why pursuing meaningful goals and dreams can also benefit the others in their lives, especially. I know as a mom and as a role model for my daughter or other young women. And then also as a role model for my son who will want that person in his life eventually to be strong and pursuing their own goals and dreams.
[00:08:41] You can't do it all. And you do usually have to give something up here and there to achieve your own goals and dreams. But looking at the big picture, you can see where you can be intentional about spending time with your loved ones, really that [00:09:00] quality over quantity. And that's something that really comes up a lot in the coaching sessions, because we're very conscious of not wanting to take from others in order to achieve.
[00:09:14] And then another thing that I see with the people that I'm engaging with, either in my coaching programs or in groups that I'm in, is that idea of engaging in creative ideas. This really spans a lot. For example, I sometimes used to compare myself to my husband. Who's a talented musician. And then my kids both have talents in music and art, and I never really felt like a very creative person, but my husband actually reminded me that from his perspective, putting dinner on the table or the way I put dinner on the table is creative.
[00:09:57] Definitely. When my kids were younger, [00:10:00] I did pursue other hobbies that required creativity like knitting and gardening. But in the meantime, I do enjoy expressing my creativity in my coaching and writing. So finding that expressive, creative outlet, whatever it is also important to leading in and creating your extraordinary life.
[00:10:23] All right, now, I'm going to come back just for a very short bit. To my friends impression that many women aren't interested in pursuing an extraordinary life, we're pushing out of their comfort zone. And I still don't believe it's entirely true. I've talked to enough women that may be on the outside.
[00:10:45] Don't seem like they're interested, but they're really still working on that courage muscle. And then even if they are expressing interest often. They just don't know how to break out of their comfort zone [00:11:00] or sometimes even their survival zone. Then there's also the downside. And of course, I can't say for sure, I have not looked at any studies about this.
[00:11:12] I'm guessing that in our society, that over-drinking that hours of TV watching and even over spending that we see in a lot of the developed world. Or a symptom of not knowing how to pursue an extraordinary life. I hope that I do inspire some of them to break free, either from being an example, or even sharing it with others.
[00:11:40] Like you, who may inspire others as well by achieving your own goals and following your dreams. In the coming weeks, I will be sharing more about just what makes an extraordinary life also, how you can [00:12:00] activate the 10 human drives so that you can create an engaged, challenging, joyful, connected, and meaningful life.
[00:12:10] Because when we get stuck in any of these areas, that's when life can become a little bit more adult sometimes. So I will be sharing that also, if you'd like to start the process of clarifying your goals and dreams, please do join my Design Your
Decade online workshop. You can purchase the, do it yourself version.
[00:12:34] It's only $27 and I'll lead you through it and you can do it on your own time through videos and worksheets or coming up in December, I will be running some live interactive online workshops. So whichever one of those works for you, I will share the links in the show notes. So have a great rest of your [00:13:00] day and I will see you in here next week.
[00:13:04] Bye for now. Thank you for listening to the Extraordinary life Podcast with writer and coach Crystal Obregon. We'd love to connect with you outside of the podcast, too, to find more helpful insights, show notes and more about Crystal. I go to crystal obregon.com. That's O B R E G O N, where you will also find info for the Design Your
[00:13:26] This workshop will help you to stop drifting and start creating until next time be extraordinary.