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What Defines an Extraordinary Life?

clarity inspiration Nov 10, 2021

Listen instead on The Extraordinary Life Podcast

My coaching, workshops, blog, and podcast all focus on helping women like you create an extraordinary life; but what exactly defines an extraordinary life? At the core, I consider an extraordinary life to be one that lifts you out of your comfort zone in pursuit of growth, joy, and purpose. To give you a better idea of what that might look like for you, I want to share some components of an extraordinary life, and the types of women who are pursuing their own. 

Regular Women Pursuing Extraordinary Lives

The women that I see creating extraordinary lives aren’t unusual people. They haven’t been climbing the Himalayas or heading Fortune 500 companies, or unlocking hidden mysteries of the human body. They are the same people you see at the grocery store, driving their kids to soccer practice, or helping their aging parents with yard work. They truly are people just like you. 

When my clients first come to me, most of them would describe their lives as comfortable. They have what they need, they enjoy their family and friends, but they are seeking something more. Despite having happily kept the status quo for years (or decades!), they want more meaning, purpose, change, growth, joy, and challenge out of their lives. 

They are often feeling an underlying sense of discontent as they go through their day-to-day lives, and of doing what they are supposed to be doing day in and day out. There may even be guilt for taking time and attention away from their role of being the ideal partner, family member, mom, employee, or boss. Yet at the same time, most are already taking steps toward more fulfillment! 

They are surrounding themselves with more like-minded people, such as those in my Extraordinary Life Tribe. They are more in tune with their preferences in life, and are looking toward the future. Most importantly, the women I work with are realizing that they must actively work toward creating a life that fulfills them, because they know it won’t happen on its own.

The very first thing I do with my clients (or they do on their own, with my on-demand Design Your Decade Workshop,) is to work on clarifying what they really want both right now, and in the future. Once we have that clarity, the fun in designing and pursuing an extraordinary life begins! And I say “pursue” because an extraordinary life is meant to be lived along the way to achieving those bigger, future goals. 

The Components of an Extraordinary Life

I think one of the most exciting things about pursuing an extraordinary life is that it’s different for each person. It’s such an honor to be able to walk alongside my clients as they discover what they want the most deeply out of their lives, and then to help them create it. At the same time, however, I do see certain components show up over and over. A big one is making everything fit.

My clients are almost all women, and it’s vitally important for them that their extraordinary lives fit with “their people”. They want to pursue what’s important to them, but not at the detriment to their connections with family or friends. In the beginning, there may be a fear that their own aspirations will take away from their relationships, but it quickly proves to be the opposite. 

As you pursue a more fulfilling life, it becomes an opportunity to connect more - as you learn, grow, and share your experiences. I know that as a mom and role model to my children, creating a life that I love is setting an example for them. I want my daughter to be strong and clear on what she wants out of her life, and for my son to see women actively pursuing their own goals and dreams. 

Something that comes up a lot in my coaching sessions is that we don’t want to take time away from our relationships. But because you can’t do it all, sometimes things have to give in order for you to go after what you want - it just doesn’t have to be negative! The women creating purposeful lives with meaning know the secret: it’s about intention. You can be intentional with the time you spend with your loved ones, and quality beats quantity every time. You really don’t need to take from others in order to achieve things for yourself. 

Another common thread that I see in my coaching programs or groups that I’m a part of, is the idea of engaging in creative ideas. Now, I never saw myself as a creative person. My husband is an amazing musician, and both of my kids are talented at art and music. I would compare myself to them and feel inadequate in that department. Yet as I connected with my husband about this, he had a different perspective. 

When the kids were younger, I’d garden and even knit, and the way I put dinner on the table each night showed a level of creativity. Today, I express my creativity in coaching and writing. So creativity isn’t just about being artistic, but finding an expressive outlet within your extraordinary life. 

Why Pursue the Extraordinary? 

I had a conversation with a friend recently that really gave me pause. We were talking about my coaching, and she expressed that I should work more with young adults, as they are just starting out in life and have bigger goals and dreams than women of our age. She mentioned this because in my past two podcasts, I’ve used young adults as examples of developing influence and demonstrating courage. I clearly disagree!

It may seem on the outside that many women aren’t interested in pursuing an extraordinary life, or pushing out of their comfort zone, but I don’t think that’s entirely true. I’ve talked to enough women to know that while they may not seem interested, they might be still working on their courage muscle. Or even if they have expressed interest in wanting more, they don’t know how to break outside of their comfort zone.

I also suspect that the many tools we use to disconnect from the world, like binge-watching television, overspending, overeating, or drinking too much, are a symptom of not knowing how to go after an extraordinary life. 

It’s my goal to help women realize that everyone can have an extraordinary life and inspire others by following their dreams. In upcoming posts, I’ll be sharing more about how you can activate the ten human drives so that you can create an engaged, challenging, joyful, connected, and meaningful life.

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