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Have you ever noticed that you get what you expect out of life? That what you think is going to happen does? We all live with an unconscious expectation of ourselves and our own lives, and this expectation not only determines what we have in our lives, but it also represents what we're willing to settle for. It’s a very powerful emotion and one that few people ever learn to harness to improve their situation. That’s a shame, because whatever you expect with certainty is what you will get in your life.

Ralph Charell said, "Nobody succeeds beyond his or her wildest expectations unless he or she begins with some wild expectations." So what are your expectations for your life? Are you excited about your future or do you face it with apprehension, fear, or even dread? These thoughts can be about the far away future or what you expect for your day. 

Why We Keep Low Expectations

For many people, the future holds too many uncertainties, and the fear...

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The other day, my yoga teacher Kofi said “The Yogi is someone who takes responsibility for the thoughts that go through their mind.” I love the simplicity and deep meaning behind this quote, and it fits perfectly with my recent podcasts on managing your thoughts. This week, I want to talk about managing your thoughts when things aren’t going your way. 

Balance is a Myth

I find that many of my clients come to me feeling overwhelmed about having to do it all, while also wanting more out of their life. It feels like they can’t keep up in life as it is, so going after their bigger dreams seems impossible. My coaching approach is an active process, and I know (and want you to accept) that your circumstances and the balance between the different parts of your life will always be shifting. 

What this means is that I encourage you and show you how to take action in your life, so you can learn as you go. Sometimes, you’ll spend more time and ...

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Wouldn’t it be amazing if you could create a life roadmap so you knew exactly where you were going and which forks in the road to follow toward your goals? Since “the great pause” over the past 2 ½ years, I’ve been hearing a lot of “well, what now?” from within my network. It’s hard to feel sure what steps to take next after all the uncertainty, but I have five questions that will help you find clarity. Your answers will also serve as a roadmap, something you can refer to when faced with tough decisions or when you don’t know what to do next. 

I encourage you to think about your answers and write them down. There is something about writing that cements the thoughts into your mind, and makes them more tangible. It will also serve as a reference that you can come back to anytime you need. 

If you’re ready to jump back into life and achieve your dreams, I’d love to invite you to my FREE workshop coming up: Quickstart Strategies to Create an Extr...

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Last week I shared strategies on how to train your negative thoughts to be more positive because the thoughts that move through your head have everything to do with your confidence, success, and even your health. (Check it out here.) This week, I’m taking that concept one step further, and sharing how you can set up your internal environment for those positive thoughts to flourish. In other words, what can you do so that your brain is more receptive to the positive messages you're sending it? 

Studies show that you can prime your brain to be more open to feeling confident, positive, and to making healthier choices both for your body and your mind. You can physically alter your brain circuitry to promote more positive responses with simple practices that anyone can fit into their day. 

Give Meditation a Chance

Meditation has been around for literally thousands of years, and for good reason. If you’re the type of person who thinks they could n...

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We are exposed to a lot of negativity in the news and media, and you can try to avoid that. But you really shouldn’t have to be exposed to negativity in your own head. Your inner dialogue is one of the biggest influences on your confidence, self-esteem, and the results you create for yourself. If your negative inner voice is too loud these days, I have ways to help you turn that around. 

You Are Not Your Thoughts

Some people are naturally more positive and have an empowering inner voice. If that’s you, then that’s amazing! It didn’t happen by accident. Either you grew up with people that taught you to speak to yourself that way, or you've developed a positive-thinking habit and your life likely reflects that positivity.

For the rest of us that lean towards negative thought chatter, know that you aren’t alone. Researchers from the National Institute of Health estimate that we think about 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts a day, and about 80% ...

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 We tend to associate creativity with painting, crafting, or music, but it goes far beyond that. I know that I never thought of myself as creative until my husband pointed out how I can create meals out of anything we have on hand. Still, you don’t need to make something to express yourself creatively; creative expression is all about how you share your unique identity with the world. 

Creative Expression

With my coaching clients, we spend an entire session on creative expression because it’s so important to living an Extraordinary Life. It’s about sensing and exhibiting the true you. It’s about voicing your ideas and leaving your authentic mark on the world. Being the REAL YOU is at the core of your Extraordinary Life. 

Comparison can get in the way of your creativity, but so can consuming the creativity of others. With so many movies, tv shows, Tik Toks, Instagram reels, social media, etc., we’re surrounded by things other people have c...

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I recently had the opportunity to interview the personal trainer Jenny Roth of Coaching Character. She is full of life and has built her unconventional business by breaking the rules and on the radical belief that you’re the expert of your own body. 

The Real Expert

There are a lot of experts out there doing the things they are best at, helping others with their talent, and making a living at it. As a personal trainer, Jenny is an expert in strength training and movement, but she takes a different approach. Rather than showing up to each session and telling you what your body needs, she wants to listen to your body first. 

In the early years as a personal trainer, she saw a lot of people being dismissed by “the experts”. The younger, fitter trainers would dismiss the complaints, concerns, and experiences of their usually older clients when they shared how they felt. It really struck Jenny that anyone, even herself, would think that they knew...

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I've had several opportunities to reflect on my young adult life lately. One reason is that I’m watching my daughter navigate her life in college and my son weave his way through high school, but something else has popped up. I may have an opportunity to advise students at the university I attended, and it’s brought back memories of all kinds. 

I’ve been looking back at how my own young adult life unfolded, and where a mentor would have been very helpful and maybe changed the trajectory of my life. Regret isn’t productive and I don’t have room for it at this point in my life. After all, if my life didn’t happen the way it did, I wouldn’t have all the people and relationships that I’m so grateful for now. Rather, I’m looking back at the choices I made, how I made them, and what I can learn from them for the future. 

Bringing Up the Past

With this new opportunity to advise students in the department I did research in, I've been thinking about ...

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Imposter syndrome is nothing new, at least not in the many business and self-development groups I belong to (including my own!). Most of the discussions and tips about it focus on how to stop comparing ourselves to others, but there is another type of “comparisonitis” that is just as tough to overcome: comparing yourself to yourself. I had an embarrassing case of it myself recently that I think you will relate to.

The Dreaded Comparisonitis

Okay, “comparisonitis” isn’t a real word. But if it was, I’d define it as the loss of motivation resulting from the comparison to someone else that appears to be doing better than you are. And yes, that other person can also be you. It could be the younger you, an idea of who you should be, or even goals you once had but no longer align with. When I chose to bike a once-familiar route with my husband a few weekends ago, I had no idea that I’d face all of the versions of self-comparisonitis. 

Getting Back...

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With our summer road trip over and my son back to school, I’m trying to get back into my morning routine. It fell apart over the summer and I’m noticing! Before, I’d been sleeping through the night and my hot flashes and headaches were practically non-existent. I’ve started waking up at 4am regularly, so you could say I’m pretty motivated to get back to what works. 

I Embraced 4am (Once)

Normally when I wake up too early, I’ll try my hardest to get back to sleep or get up for a bit before returning to bed. When the latter happens, I end up waking up later and my morning routine doesn’t happen because the rest of the house is up and about. So the last time I woke up at 4am, I decided to just get up and stay up. 

I used this time to take my morning routine to the limit, and while I won’t be doing this every morning, it was a great reminder of why I do it. It works, and makes me feel good! So what did I manage to do in those extra few h...